Three years ago I had lost a job, was on my way to divorce, and my father died. A well meaning friend looked at me and said, “I don’t know how you get out of bed in the morning!” I can remember thinking, “Do I have a choice?”
Well apparently my shit cycle runs in threes because I recently went through a very “low” time in my life again. Wait, I’m trying to shine a turd…I”m still going through it, but doing much better. And I was talking to my therapist and told him that I feel as though I’m a weak man. Regardless of my own training as a therapist and a pastor…I have the same thoughts and issues as everyone else. And to struggle with heartache, and depression just makes me feel weak. I wanted to know why I can’t just move on and be more positive!
My therapist asked me something I’ll never forget, “Do you still get out of bed every morning and move forward?” Again, “Do I really have a choice?” He let me know that I absolutely have a choice, and every morning I was choosing to get my ass out of bed. I never thought of it that way. When Alexa starts sounding that alarm in the morning (I’ll be honest with you) I wake up and think, “I can’t do this again. I can’t go on the radio and be fun, funny, and goofy today. I can’t listen to 100 straight country songs that make me remember why I’m hurting. Hell, I am a country song!” Many of you know what I’m saying, when we are struggling emotionally…we would prefer to sleep it off, but I don’t and neither do you, we put our feet on the ground and move forward.
If you are struggling with depression, anxiety, heartache, grief, or all of the above…it doesn’t make you weak. It makes you human! We all go through difficult times, and it doesn’t make us weak. In fact, if we wake up each morning, get our ass out of bed, and move forward…we are showing an incredible level of strength. We are saying, “I’m going to win this battle!” We aren’t giving in to it…we are giving it hell!
May you continue to get up every morning and push forward, because not only are you showing strength…you are building it. Resist the voice of the enemy that says, “You’re weak!” You are a bad ass who is growing stronger each day! This too will pass, and you will be stronger and ready to thrive in 2020.
Tony Russell, The Pastor of Disaster