No Humor in Someone Losing Their Honey: Divorce of Russell & Ashton Wilson

russell-Wilson-Ashton-Meem-wedding-picWhen the news of Russell and Ashton Wilson filing for divorce was released I was honestly saddened and disappointed.  Not disappointed in them as individuals, but that apparently their marriage is over.  Like the many fans here in Seattle I have enjoyed seeing the pictures of the two of them visiting our local children’s hospital.  I pictured them as having a wonderful marriage full of happiness, faith, and excitement.  Even as a counselor who knows what you see is often not what you get…I allowed myself to put them on a pedestal.  I think a byproduct of moving into midlife as a man is that we get more sentimental about life and even love!  We realize how quickly life goes, and we want to see younger people enjoying every moment of it.

As a radio personality it is expected that I’ll say something comedic or controversial about the situation, but I haven’t been able to bring myself to that point with this situation.  Yes, I know they are both young, they have no children, and they will find love again, but that still doesn’t negate the fact that yet another marriage has failed.  I too filed for divorce when I was in my mid-twenties with no children involved, and it was still a very painful process.  No one is prepared for the friends and family members they lose in that process.  My point being that a divorce is always painful even if it is needed and/or wanted. There is truly life after divorce, but at the moment it is happening the world seems very dark for most.  This is especially true for those who have children, and file for divorce.  They then have to battle depression, anxiety, and the ugly one…guilt.

I simply want those of you who are thinking about getting a divorce to follow the advice my mother gave me at one time.  Do everything you can to save your marriage before walking away from it.  And by trying everything I’m talking about marital counseling, sitting down together and truly listening to what the other wants from the relationship, and being willing to make some changes and compromises.  But with all of that being said remember that you only get one life to live, and you should be happy and be treated with love and compassion.  I would never encourage someone to stay in a relationship where they are miserable, but make sure you can’t find love right where you are before moving on.  I am married to the love of my life, and I’m so glad we stuck together through the difficult times.

 

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Make Your Mess Your Message: #Seahawks’ Derrick Coleman Surprises Hearing-Impaired Girls #gohawks

I love this video and it reminds me of my favorite quote, “Make your mess your message!”  We all have bad experiences, disabilities, and challenges in life.  We can choose to become a victim, or take the mess and make it our message.  A message that inspires others!

What is your mess?  What challenges have you had in life, and how did you learn to overcome or deal with them?  There are people who need to hear your story!  Feel free to share them below in the comments, and I would love for you to subscribe to The Next half.

ABC News’ Rich McHugh and Katie Conway report: There will be two very special guests at this Sunday’s Super Bowl game in New Jersey’s MetLife Stadium thanks to one of the game’s biggest stars. Seattle Seahawks’ fullback Derrick Coleman became a viral star after a…

via Seahawks’ Derrick Coleman Surprises Hearing-Impaired Girls.

Sherman vs. Crabtree: Don’t cut their nuts off just yet!

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Richard Sherman went to shake hands with Michael Crabtree after the playoff game, and Crabtree literally pushed him away. Sherman then goes on TV seconds to a minute later with a rant, and now they are both being labeled bad sports, and horrible role models for our children. Yes, the wussification of men in America continues.

What happened to the days when men who talked a little crap and had testosterone rushing through their veins were admired? Could it be that men today are so bored with their lives that they’ve forgotten the feeling of adrenaline pumping in their hearts…that feeling like they can conquer the world?  And for the love of double bacon cheeseburgers, what happened to allowing people to be real and speak their minds even when we didn’t agree with them?  Give me that over an athlete who pretends to be humble, and thanks God for giving HIM the victory as if HE is God’s favorite athlete.  Yes, that sounds awesome, but I’m fairly certain God loves all athletes the same.  Well, I do think Tim Tebow might be God’s favorite quarterback.  He loves Tim so much he obviously doesn’t want him to get hit seeing as though he can’t make a roster.  But I digress!

It’s a game played by young men who are strong and confident.  Allow them to express that and don’t ask them to raise your children.  There will come a day when our PC world will figure out a way to cut their balls off as well. Until then, let them remind you of what it feels like to be a full of energy, passion, and confidence.  And yes!  Let them remind you of the freedom you felt when you ran your mouth without thinking. Better yet, let them challenge all of us to find that same freedom and passion for something…any thing! And let’s pursue that with the maturity and wisdom we have gained throughout the years.

Tony Russell

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