When I moved to Washington almost 5 years ago I would have told you it was because this is where God wanted me to be. There was little doubt in mine or Amy’s mind that God was sending us from Texas to the great Northwest! Well if this has been part of God’s plan then it was poorly thought out. Yes, we have made some incredible friends here and absolutely love the culture and beauty that surrounds us, but little has gone right for us financially, mentally, physically, and even spiritually.
I only write this because It is my form of therapy, and helps me process it, but it has truly been one disappointment after another. And being a former pastor I know all of the amazing clichés that can be tossed my way like, “God didn’t promise us things would be easy, God puts us through trials to strengthen our faith, & God is there during the storms.” What people don’t like to think about is the fact that maybe…just maybe God had nothing to do with the decision. It is possible that what I thought was God guiding or speaking to me was nothing more than wishful thinking, or gas from a bad plate of lasagna.
Let me give you a great example of what I’m talking about in this blog laced with sarcasm and discouragement. About a year ago I was talking with a lady who informed me that God had used the Wolf’s station vehicle to speak to her (100.7 The Wolf). She said that she was praying about her pastor, whom she thought was a “Wolf in sheep’s clothing”, and then she saw our vehicle pull up next to her! And she knew at that moment that God was communicating with her. So she then likely went to the elders of her church to get rid of the Wolf (aka pastor).
I’m not here to say that God does or doesn’t communicate with us, but I have learned that I need to be very careful when I think God is speaking to me or others. I have never heard an audible voice, but I’ve been thinking…He is God so if He really wanted me to know something wouldn’t it be loud and clear? I just believe that there are more times in life where people believe they are following God when in reality He is following them, and He is likely thinking, “Why in the world would he think I wanted him to do this?”